“Congratulations and Best Wishes to TOM and ROSE”
“Tom and Rose” are celebrating their 57th Wedding Anniversary, this Sunday, March 24.”
“May the Almighty Yahweh, continue to Bless you both – now and always!” D.V.
This is added – just for Mr. Wonderful, himself!
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“Do GOOD Intentions or NOT”
10 Good Intentions That Aren’t Really Doing Any Good
Sometimes we have the best intentions and yet those “good intentions” actually make matters worse instead of better. Most of us have witnessed or felt the power of others’ good intentions on us and ours on them. But have we stopped to consider the power of our intentions, kind or unkind? Today’s post is about some of the ways our well-meaning ways may be going awry.
#1 Saying “Let me know if there is anything I can do.
How many times have we heard (or uttered) this? While it’s a lovely thing to say, it puts the pressure on the other person to ASK for help. It may make you feel better because you OFFERED, but your friend in a crisis is too overwhelmed to remember that you did.
A better option: Take action! Drop off a dinner, pick kids up from school, go over and clean (or send a cleaning service), or help organize friends and neighbors to do whatever needs to be done. Take a cue from Nike and “Just Do It.”
#2 Indulging in back-handed compliments.
A couple of oldies, but not-so-goodies, that come to mind:
“You look great for your age.” — Nix the “for your age”…try “You look great!” Period.
“Have you lost weight?” — The implied unsaid words….”because you needed to.” I realize that’s not always the case, but it’s a tricky one. A better alternative, “You look happy and healthy!” Every person wants both of those things.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look just like [insert celebrity name here]? — Not every famous face is universally admired. I have a nephew who is a dead-ringer for Wil Farrell and HATES when people tell him that. Think twice.
#4 Apologizing for no reason.
“I’m sorry the house is a mess;” “I’m sorry I overcooked the steaks on the grill;” “I’m sorry for not calling you back.”
No one wants to be told how to feel, so a pre-emptive apology can seem controlling and off-putting. If someone is upset, wait for them to tell you, then apologize.
#5 Nursing your GUILT.
It’s OK to feel guilty about something and try to correct it, but then you have to let it go. When it drags on, guilt usually gets mixed up with shame and becomes more about who you are than what you did. Once a situation is properly addressed, guilt does absolutely nothing for you except cause pain.
#6 Indulging in these well-meaning but misguided zingers…..
“You’re so much better off without him/her!” — Umm….newsflash….people get back together! Can you say awkward? This also implies that the person just “get over it” which is just annoying! Other phrases to avoid: “I never liked him/her,” or “He/she was the worst!”
“When the timing is right, it will happen.” — This is usually said when referring to infertility issues…a touchy subject if there ever was one! This phrase is probably one of the worst you can use when talking to someone dealing with it. Chances are “That is not fair” is all she wants to hear
#7 Answering questions for your kids.
It may create a moment of social awkwardness, but kids need to learn that their parents don’t solve all their problems for them. Let your child struggle a bit. For example, resist answering for him or her when a waiter asks them how old they are. Watching them wrestle with shyness can be painful, but it’s better for them in the long term.
#8 Offering unsolicited advice.
Often, people know what they want to do or should do. They’re coming to you to feel understood and cared for, not because they want you to give them a solution. As they talk about their predicament, listen rather than try to control the conversation.
People who are suffering from trauma don’t need advice. They need comfort and support. Often, people know what they want to do or should do. They’re coming to you to feel understood and cared for.
Unless someone asks for advice, don’t give it. Instead say, “I’m sorry” or “This must really be hard for you” or “Can I bring you a pot roast?” Don’t say, “Here’s what I would do if I were you.”
#9 Encouraging your partner to lose weight.
Suggesting that a partner should lose weight or diet implies that the partner is overweight, unattractive, not sexy anymore, etc., which can be a painful message to hear. Hurtful comments, even if well-intentioned, may contribute to poor body image and unhealthy eating behaviors.
Chances are more than good that those who are overweight know it! They know donuts have more calories than celery. People who are constantly urged to diet and lose weight sometimes go out of their way to overeat, a kind of rebellion against their partner.
A better option: emphasize health rather than appearance, and focus on adopting a healthier lifestyle rather than dieting.
#10 Not understanding “The Ring Theory.”
I read about this theory by clinical psychologist Susan Silk in the LA Times a couple of years ago and thought it was brilliant!
It works for all kinds of crises: medical, legal, financial, even romantic! She calls it the Ring Theory and it works like this:
Draw a circle. This is the center ring. In it, put the name of the person at the center of the current trauma. For example, someone who has recently been diagnosed with an illness. Now draw a larger circle around the first one. In that ring put the name of the person next closest to the trauma. For example, the significant other of the person diagnosed.
Repeat the process as many times as you need to. In each larger ring put the next closest people. Parents and children before more distant relatives. Intimate friends in smaller rings, less intimate friends in larger ones.
Here are the rules. The person in the center ring can say anything she wants to anyone, anywhere. She can complain and whine and moan and curse the heavens and say, “Life is unfair” and “Why me?” That’s the one payoff for being in the center ring.
Everyone else can say those things too, but only to people in larger rings.
When you are talking to a person in a ring smaller than yours, someone closer to the center of the crisis, the goal is to help. Listening is often more helpful than talking. But if you’re going to open your mouth, ask yourself if what you are about to say is likely to provide comfort and support. If it isn’t, don’t say it.
If you want to scream or cry or complain, that’s fine. Just do it to someone in a bigger ring.
Comfort IN, dump OUT. Don’t just avoid dumping into the center ring, avoid dumping into any ring smaller than your own.
Remember, you can say whatever you want if you just wait until you’re talking to someone in a larger ring than yours.
And don’t worry. We’ll all get our turn in the center ring. We can count on that. :-/
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“National Countdown Day – March 21 “
NATIONAL COUNTDOWN DAY
NATIONAL COUNTDOWN DAY
3…2…1…National Countdown Day on March 21 ticks down the minutes, seconds or days to events big and small.
3…2…1…July 16, 1969, Apollo 11 launches into the atmosphere carrying the crew for the first moon landing.
3…2…1…Y2K, everyone partied like it was 1999 until the new millennium arrived.
3…2…1…January 19, 2013, Marlo Anderson quietly launched a website called National Day Calendar.
3…2…1…it’s 5 o’clock somewhere!
On National Countdown Day, 03/21, we can start a countdown to just about anything. Around the office, it’s a countdown to the next celebration every day! Consider past and present countdowns of significance.
Recently parts of the United States counted down to August 21, 2017, to a total solar eclipse. The event created road trip opportunities for those within driving distance and science party lessons on rooftops in the path of the eclipse. It was a memorable countdown, indeed. Did you miss it? Start your countdown for April 8, 2024. This solar eclipse will cover parts of Mexico, Central and Northeastern United States and just a bit of Canada.
ROYAL COUNTDOWNS
Countdowns to royal weddings draw a lot of attention. The fanfare and commitment to tradition remind us of storybook weddings. There are several royal weddings to recall; Prince Charles and Lady Diana Spencer on July 29, 1981; Prince William and Catherine Middleton, April 29, 2011; Prince Harry and Meghan Markle on May 19, 2018.
Another British countdown that keeps the world interested is the countdown to Brexit. Or is it not it?
UNITED STATES COUNTDOWNS
Some favorite U.S. countdowns in the U.S. are countdowns to opening day – this could be the opening day of baseball, racing, the swimming pool or hunting season. The countdown to tax day, election day, or even the closing bell can be a positive or ominous one. It all depends on the outcome and sometimes one depends on the results of the other countdowns!
SUMMER AND SPORTS
Countdowns to summer break may be started as early as September 1 or as late as spring break. Those who motor on two wheels like to countdown to Sturgis and sports enthusiasts have countdowns to March Madness, Gameday, and Olympic Opening Ceremonies.
HOW TO OBSERVE
On National Countdown Day, start a countdown to something significant to you. Around National Day Calendar, we countdown to meaningful, useful, notable, unusual, quirky and remarkable events all the time. It makes us #CelebrateEveryDay.
Whether you’re counting down to a homecoming or a wedding, to your last chemo treatment or your graduation, start your countdown. What will you countdown to? Use #321Day to share on social media.
Educators, visit the National Day Calendar® Classroom for a project dedicated to National Countdown Day.
HISTORY
National Day Calendar® proclaimed National Countdown Day to celebrate all the ways people countdown to important moments in our lives.
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“Fly and Celebrate with Russ Lessor, Today”
“Happy Birthday Russ”
…and “What a Day… it is TODAY”
First Day of Spring – and we have had all kinds of weather in just this one day, just to prove the fact, that if you live in “MISSOURI” – YOU for sure, can live any where in these UNITED STATES of America!
Today is my friend, “RUSS LESSOR’s BIRTHDAY” but, of course he is no longer here on “EARTH” – he has already joined and is along and among so many others, in that heavenly realm above, with all of those “Bible-believers” that, believe in a better LIFE in HEAVEN with the Almighty, and so, that is why, this PHOTO above, is my choice – to remember “RUSS.”
Some time before “Russ” had left here, Earth – he had wanted my son, “Al” to give him a ride in the air-plane you see above. “Russ” was a bit on the larger dimensions, as the interior of the plane is quite narrow and sometimes people forget, that they are absolutely and positively, just going to feel like a stuffed sardine in a small and narrow air-plane , but – “Russ” just put himself in – even though he could not buckle in, but no matter what, he was not going to fall out.
After the flight, flying all around town and neighboring areas that he wanted to see, from above, “Russ” felt like he fitted in so well, he was ready to take another trip around, this was the best FUN he had in years, he just could not stop telling everyone, about the terrific time he had with my son, “Al” – just flying around in Missouri and even to some parts of Illinois.
I only wish that, back then, I had a movie camera that day, for it would have really been FUN, to have motion pictures , NOW – of them flying around, up and down and doing all kinds of maneuvers, as only Al can do, especially for those of us down here, on the ground that are watching and as for TODAY – right NOW – as we will and forever be watching and enjoying this extra special “Air SHOW” that only “Al” will perform when he has an audience, as he knows that, we are just wanting to see more and more fancy flying!
So – “HAPPY BIRTHDAY – Russ Lessor” and many more, and, I’ll bet you are NOW, able to do a whole lot of “FUN FLYING” – but just not, where we can see you, so until then and when – we can see you again – – have FUN! D.V.
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“Happy Birthday…Gramps”
… Thomas F. Brandy, himself – from Ireland”…
MARCH 19th, 2019 – Thomas F. Brady – my Grandfather – came to America from Ireland as a very young lad with his Mother. And, as I remember the story – in Ireland they did not keep an accurate accounting of one’s age – so, to be sure that he was 18 years old – he had to stretch his arm up and over the top of his head – and be able to reach the ear-lobe on the other side of his head! He did and was declared to be 18 years old! This was in the mid 1850s.
“Happy Birthday and many Blessings from our Almighty Yahweh – our Creator and LOVE of our LIFE!” D.V.
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“Vacation Time is FUN – Let’s FLY”
Cape Kennedy” -“AMERICA’s SPACE STATION”
“Cape Kennedy” – “AMERICA’s SPACE STATION”
L to R – is Donald and little Al and Lee, Jr. Aldrich
“How’s the “AIR” up there?” That sure was a surprise to little “Al” to be put up there – above all of us – and he could be calling for HELP!
A new name, “Cape Kennedy” a change from the previous and so well known “Cape Canaveral”, Florida, 32953 – only happened – after “President Kennedy” was assassinated, so that, we AMERICANS would have a remembrance of what he stood for “Space Flight” and also, that all of us “AMERICANS” will just have a plan to see and visit – as we were planning to do, while on our way to Merrit Island to visit cousin, Jimmie Brady Shilling.
I remember , as if, it were just yesterday, a slow and enjoyable vacation, driving up the Florida Highway coast and just far enough away from home, Fort Lauderdale, and stopping for breakfast. We started our day nice and early, just so we could stop at a restaurant, other than our own – and enjoy meals prepared without our help.
We were planning on staying a full week and enjoying the swimming at Jimmy’s place on Merrit Island. They had spent sometime at our home in Fort Lauderdale – and said to come up, to their place and plan on doing some nice sight-seeing.
That is Al Aldrich , sitting at the top of the base for the AIR CRAFT , just above his head as little Al is near or just 2 years of age. Al had already made a “solo trip” from Fort Lauderdale, Florida to St.Louis, MO via Eastern Air Lines, at the age of “eighteen” months. He is now a licensed pilot today, and Helicopters being his favorite way to fly, and I have often wonder, did little “AL” like sitting up there and did that trip to Merrit Island inspire him, to learn to fly?
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