“Take the subject of happiness”

Apr 12th “Take the subject of happiness”

Know Your “Why”

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”
―Confucius

We humans make things so complicated.

Take the subject of happiness, which can be as elusive as it is desirable.

According to an online Harris Poll of 2,345 U.S. adults, only one in three Americans say they’re ‘very happy’, as has been the trend since 2009.

Even worse, our drive to be happy may interfere with achieving the goal. When we strongly want to be happy … we may create a standard that can’t be met.

Thinking: “I must always be happy” can result in disappointment and guilt, which ironically can prevent the happiness we so desire.

Once we understand the internal nature of the condition we can take this “happiness horse” … by the reins and be happy whenever we like.

Instantly!

Here’s the secret, and don’t be deceived by its utter simplicity.

If you want to be happy all the time:

then… find something to be happy about … all the time!

At any given moment, you can choose dozens of things to be happy about.

No matter how bad things seem to be, like the man who complained about having no shoes, until he saw another man with no legs…

there is always something we can be happy about – a warm bed, a friend, spouse, lover, child, pet, job, not being in pain, eyesight, hearing, hands, feet, fingers, toes, ability to walk, no deformities etc.

The good news: we can only think one thought at a time.

In other words, if you are thinking a good thought you CANNOT at the same time think a bad one.

Thus, to be constantly happy, be constantly thinking good thoughts.

Because our brains can’t tell the difference between what we’re thinking in our heads and what’s really happening in our physical, real life experiences, by placing attention on what’s right, we’ll be upregulating and enhancing the activity of dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin, which are the brain correlates of contentment and satisfaction.

This, by the way is the true meaning of Paul’s New Testament admonition in Thessalonians 5:17 to “Pray without ceasing”.

Is that too simple?

Well maybe it is but don’t be fooled, the greatest ideas usually are.

As playwright Clare Boothe Luce wrote in the 1930’s “… the height of sophistication is simplicity”.

If you’re feeling less happy than you’d like, give it a shot.

Write down 10 or 20 or even 100 things you appreciate in your life.

Then, every time some unpleasant thought arises, redirect your attention to something on the list. Over and over and over use all negative thoughts as a signal or cue to return to something you’re happy about.

Try and see what happens.

Chances are it will be much harder to stay with negativity, and even if you only manage to catch yourself and redirect just a few times a day, you’re going to find yourself a lot happier than you would be otherwise.

If you keep at it, eventually you may very well find yourself happy most, or even all of the time!

Paul’s New Testament admonition in Thessalonians 5:17 to “Pray without ceasing”.

Thoreau said “the mass of men live lives of quiet desperation” and what he may have meant was, humans are desperate to survive, quietly perhaps, but desperate nonetheless.

If you want to be excited about getting up in the morning, about doing your day and especially about doing the hard stuff, that you’d rather not do, you have to have a purpose or a “why”.

And you have to know your “why”. Without a “why” (and a really good “why”) life is just not fun.

The price we pay is angst, stress, boredom and “what’s it all about” kind of mentality.

The world can be a scary place. Circumstances don’t show up the way we expect or want.

Entropy (the tendency of things to fall apart) is built-in and without creating and having a “why” Northstar, that can guide us through the ups and downs, life lived as quiet desperation to survive is inevitable.

And so the trick to having a successful, happy and meaningful life is to know your why.

Make it up if you have to and then live it.